Yesterday I totally rocked my own socks off.
I made it through the whole Ab Series in my Pilates class without taking a break. Oh, it hurt so good, and OMG I just about screamed for joy when it was done.
And I did it! No breaks to rest my aching abs, no flopping to the floor, no loooong paaaauses between exercises to make it easier.
Oh, sure, it's not perfected. But I DID IT! I did the whole thing! Whoooo!!!!
For the record, I'm coming at this whole "fitness" thing as a perpetual fat chick. Seriously, I've always been big, I've always been out of shape, I've always had trouble jogging let alone running, sports allude me, I'm totally uncoordinated, my arms shake when I carry the baby too long, I couldn't chase a bus to save my life, etc.
I've gotten better over the years. When I graduated college I was around 235 lbs, probably at or above 250 lbs when we adopted P. In a few years I've dropped to around 170 lbs. My lowest teen/adult weight has probably been about 165 lbs, my end goal is 150.
I've been going to the gym since November and I haven't lost any weight. And that's fine, for now anyway. My goal in going there (other than the nice showers, childcare, and girltalk) is to gain: strength, coordination, stamina, confidence. And it's working. Sure I'm sitting still around 170 but I can actually *feel* the muscles in my stomach now. I'm actually enjoying exercise. I enjoy lifting some small weights, working on abs, jumping around, cycling. It actually physically feels nice to work my body, when before it felt like pure torture.
And I'm so proud of myself! Me, the fat girl from school, the overweight stumbly chick, me, making it through a whole ab series while people all around me were dropping (their legs) like flies.
Now I just need to perfect it all and remember to do it more consistently. 10 minutes a day on the floor to strengthen core and back muscles isn't much and has a huge pay off.
And soon, I start "cross training." Nik can run up to 5 miles in a morning. And he started out just like me, flopping and weak and totally unmotivated. So let's see if I can match his 5 sometime in the next several months :)
Oh, and at some point I should probably start bringing the kids into this too, huh... :)
Lily in a loafing barn
4 months ago